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Healing invisible wounds
By Stephen J. Lee, Herald Staff Writer
Published Friday, May 18, 2007
Just returned from a tour of war duty in Afghanistan with his North Dakota National Guard unit, Sgt. 1st Class Greg Kaiser has the typical adjustments back to civilian life, he told pastors and social workers and parish nurses Thursday.
But even more, he has a father's worry about a son, who struggled himself to adjust from a bloody tour in Iraq and now is poised to go back for a second tour.
Kaiser, East Grand Forks, took part in a seminar, “Caring for Military Families,” Thursday in United Lutheran Church downtown. About seven pastors from the community, social workers and parish nurses listened to advice on what the effect of war duty can have on soldiers, their families and the community.
Kaiser is a member of the 188th Air Defense Artillery unit based in Grand Forks that returned from Afghanistan in March.
One of the little aggravations for soldiers in that theater is hearing civilians say, “Well, at least you weren't in Iraq,” Kaiser said. There are fewer U.S. soldiers in Afghanistan than Iraq, but it's just as dangerous, he said. It just doesn't get as much news coverage.
“We had 150 guys,” in the 188th SECFOR unit from Grand Forks. “We lost four soldiers,” Kaiser said.
His son, Sgt. Jamie Kaiser, is a member of the former B company of the Guard's 141st Combat Engineers unit based in Jamestown, now named the 817th.
Three years ago this month, Jamie Kaiser was in a vehicle right behind his best friend, Spc. Philip Brown of Jamestown, on patrol in Iraq when a roadside bomb hit and killed Brown. Shrapnel wounded Kaiser in his right hand. He was awarded a Purple Heart.
But as Bernadette Ternes, a licensed social worker, told the pastors and others Thursday in United Lutheran, “Some wounds are not visible.”
Greg Kaiser said his son came back from war a changed man.
“When he came back, he was a whole 'nother character,” he said. Jamie was a good athlete and scholar at Sacred Heart Catholic High School, very “directed,” and focused, Kaiser said. “He came back without direction, spent a lot to time searching,” he said.
“Went out and bought a new Chevy pickup and just drove around.
“He didn't balance his checkbook for a year and a half.”
He drank too much, tried to go too fast on motorcycles or trucks. He forgot to stop for stoplights or stop signs, because in the war zone such little things don't matter, Kaiser said.
He also got married, and he and his wife are expecting a child soon and he's doing pretty good, Greg Kaiser said.
But his Guard unit, now called the 817th, has been ordered to deploy again, this time for duty in Iraq. Despite already doing one tour, he has to go again, said his father. Jamie Kaiser's unit is scheduled to leave the country again Aug. 21, his father said.
“It does make me nervous, as a dad, to hug him again at the airport, saying goodbye,” Greg Kaiser said.
What Jamie Kaiser and his father, are going through is very typical for citizens asked to become soldiers, then warriors, then come back and be regular citizens again, Ternes told the audience of about 30 that included pastors, Guard members and others.
That's part of the reason Shelle Michaels of Grand Forks helped organize the seminar at United as well and brought the “Talking with Heroes,” live Internet radio show from the Empire Arts Center on Thursday evening.
Several veterans of the war on terror spoke on the program hosted by Bob Calvert of Colorado Springs, Colo.
Paul Goodiron, father of Cpl. Nathan Goodiron, 25, of Mandaree, N.D., who was killed in November in Afghanistan, said he “felt honor” for his son by the presence of the soldiers and the idea that thousands of people were listening via Internet radio.
He said his son and all of the soldiers still there and back home “were champions of freedom.”
Carmen Kleinwachter, whose son, Chris Kleinwachter, was killed in Afghanistan in December, stood next to Harriet Goodiron, Nathan Goodiron's mother, and held her when she cried.
Staff Sgt. Phil Wanzek, who served in a Guard unit in Afghanistan, told the Empire audience of about 30 the most important thing for him and other soldiers “was you know your family is being looked after back home.”
He and other veterans of the war said that helping out the people of Afghanistan and Iraq, especially the children, felt like a worthwhile mission.
The Guard has become good at helping soldiers re-integrate into civilian life after war duty, and there are all sorts of services available, Kaiser said. But like many young soldiers, his son isn't one to seek out help.
“I had heard all of this before,” Greg Kaiser said. “But I didn't think it would happen to my son.”
One man sat alone Thursday night in the back row of the theater, obviously moved, quietly and privately wiping away tears while listening to soldiers talk to their families or about them.
“I just came to support them,” said the man, who asked that his name not be published. “It's pretty emotional.”
He grew up in northeast North Dakota and served in the Army in Vietnam in 1967-68 and returned stateside through the Oakland, Calif., airport.
“Nobody was there,” to greet him, he said with a wry smile.
He had some difficulties making the transition back to “the world,” as Vietnam vets often referred to life outside the war, Cox said. But he went on to a career in the financial world.
“This is really good,” he said about “Talking with Heroes,” finding it difficult to say much more.
Reach Lee at (701) 780-1237 or at slee@gfherald.com.